It's been a rough week!!!

Oh man. It's been a ROUGH week for Austin! ready for this? hold on...

First, he got the flu for the first time. Not too bad, but just hasn't felt great for an entire week. Last Friday he had diarrhea, but he acted fine so Ryan dropped him off at Belinda's. As soon as he handed him over, he puked ALL OVER her face! I'm not exaggerating here. When I asked her about this, she said that while she has been puked on countless times over the years, this is the very first time it's been all over her face. She said that Austin owes her. Big time. ha!

So, he continued to have diarrhea for the next couple of days and got diaper rash. No bueno. A sore bum is worse than throwing up!

He then went to daycare again earlier in the week and puked again, except this time it was all over Ryan's freshly dry cleaned jacket and Belinda's floor. Awesome.

On Sunday I got up with Austin and was laying in his room on his floor as he played and hear he was taking a dump. And I could tell it was another wet one. yuck. I just figured I'd let him finish his business and change him immediately because of the diaper rash, but apparently this was not soon enough because as soon as I thought he was done, I sat up and there was crap all over his room. His diaper had leaked in a BIG way. And he had blueberries the night before, so it was a purple poopy party all over. nice.

I stripped him down and ran him to the tub, which consequently, got purple poopy all over mommy too. meh. The joys of motherhood. ha!

So I spray him down (which he hated on his little red bum!) and then dry him off and don't put a diaper back on, because it's best to "air out" a diaper rash, so I'm told. I figured, he just had a big poop.... he's good for another 20 minutes, so I go to fix a bottle and whatdoyaknow.... SPLAT!!! Purple poopy all over my floor, all over the wall, all over the door and a little on the carpet. So at this point, his room is a shitty mess... yes, I will call it shitty now because it's no longer remotely funny at this point.... and now the bathroom is a shitty mess. LOL!

Well, I promptly diaper my little dirty dude (after spraying him down again) and give him a bottle as I clean up. I then lay down with him as he's finishing his bottle and as soon as he's done, he sits straight up and pukes all over me. Lovely. So... at this point, all I can smell in my house is poop and puke.

Anyway, funny thing- I met a girlfriend later that day and told her this story, then asked how she was doing and her reply? I'm pregnant.....Oui!!!!! ha! Pretty funny though that I had just told he this horror story and probably smelled a bit (yes, I did not shower before I met her... sue me).

Oh what else.... I brought Austin to my office for about an hour last week and he learned to open my big heavy door to my office and then slammed his fingers in it. So he has purple poop and a purple finger nail. Poor dude.

Oh don't worry... there's more.

I lost Austin at storytime.

Yep. Mom of the Year Award right here.

I honestly don't know how it happened and it was the worst 2 minutes of my motherhood so far. Seriously. So, I go to storytime on Saturdays with a girlfriend and her little girl. It's in the cutest children's theater with stadium seating. We like to sit near the top. When story time is done, everyone lines up to go into the children's library and the lady who does storytime gives all the little ones a stamp. Well, the line can get quite long and there are a lot of people (grown ups and kiddos) down at the bottom of the theater waiting in this line. Austin and Belle went down the steps and got to the bottom and I had my eye on him as he went down the last step about 20 feet away from me, I looked away to grab my bag behind me (literally 1 second.. no joke) and he was gone. There were a bunch of people, so I couldn't see which direction he had gone. I panicked BIG TIME. Searched and searched and couldn't find him, so I yelled back at my friend and she ran down to help me. I ran out of the theater and back in and begged people around me to look for a little boy in striped shirt. At that time EVERY little kid on a striped shirt!!! Seriously! How does that happen!??!?! I ran out of the theater again to see if he had possibly gotten all the way out of the library. I ran back to the children's library and there was my friend sitting with Austin. She had been with him the entire time!!!! While I was a crazy woman running out of the library, she went the direction of the stamp lady. Of course. Belle and Austin wanted their stamps. Regardless, it was terrifying.

Oh and ready for terrible mommy story part deux? or is this part trois because of the finger incident? ugh. I've lost track. I want to preface this by saying this is something I've literally NEVER done. Ever. I ironed my skirt yesterday morning before work on the ground (running so late - I don't do this either!) and I left the house yesterday with the iron on. Yep. STUPID. The kitty could have knocked it over and burned down our entire house. anyway, we get home and Austin runs into his room to turn on the light and sees something new there and tries to pick it up. Yep. Hot iron. Seriously. I couldn't believe it. It started to blister soon afterwards and he cried off and on all night about it. SUCH mommy guilt. Like, the worst ever. I cried too. :(

And so, that was our week! Poor little man.